In the latest episode of ‘Communicate to Motivate’ we dive deeper into our series on Relationships
We have all seen great teams come together and execute textbook plays that result in a game-changing score. Group dancers grace our screens and stages with fluid and organic movements that makes it seem as if they are connected as one. It’s just like the perfect-tasting, non-burnt, melt-in-your-mouth Thanksgiving meal that could never be repeated even if you tried a hundred times. When a connection is present, it feels euphoric and can change us to our core.
In addition to the admittedly sensationalized list above, I want to add two people engaging in an interactive conversation to that list. Think back to moments in your life where you walked away from an amazing conversation with an emotional high that seemed to last forever. A conversation that you thought about hours and days later that motivated you to action. The action could have been to take the next step in a business, to further a relationship, or to make a decision that would change your current trajectory. Meaningful conversations not only stick with you, they can change you internally.
I read an article recently on ‘The Neuroscience of Conversations’ by Nicklas Balboa & Dr. Richard D. Glaser and was fascinated by the latest research on communication. The two psychologists reasoned that a deep, meaningful conversation has the power to change the brain that either allows you to open up to healthy, trusting conversation or close you down so you speak from fear, caution, and anxiety. They continued by mentioning how intentional conversations can change your brain chemistry by increasing hormones and neurotransmitters which stimulate body systems. This change in brain chemistry does not just last for the moment but can last for a lifetime.
These internal changes to our brains and bodies motivate us to seek out more conversation and pour into these strong emotional needs that are inside all of us. However, none of this is possible unless we make the commitment to effectively communicate with the people in our lives. Conversation style and communication methods are a choice, and now we realize that these choices can have lasting impressions on peoples’ brains, personalities and subsequent actions.
If you have spent years cultivating relationships with friends, families, significant others, etc. then continue the investment in the conversation arena. These moments should include deeper sharing, organic interactions, and less me and more of them. Focus on the other person by asking questions: try not to relate their words, experiences, and stories back to something in your life, but rather try pealing back their layers one at a time. Great teams can be 11 players on the field working together for a touchdown or two people sitting on a couch, with an open bottle of wine, and a conversation that takes you deep down inside both.
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